Nobody Loves A Farting Princess by Jeni Birr

Author:Jeni Birr [Birr, Jeni]
Language: eng
Format: azw3, epub
Published: 2015-03-31T04:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER 9

The hardest part of my breakup with Eric was looking at our now empty apartment the day I turned in my keys. I handed them over, barely made it out the door, and I broke down on the sidewalk, sobbing. In my moment of weakness, I texted him: “just tell me you miss me, and I’ll never ask you for anything again.” He wrote back immediately that of course he did and wanted to talk. My dad and mother were still in town for one more day so we agreed I would call him as soon as they had left. On January 2, 2010, at about two o’clock in the afternoon, I did.

We spent almost three hours on the phone that afternoon. He explained that leaving was simultaneously the worst and best decision he’d ever made. He had realized in the last two weeks that nothing in Detroit meant anything to him without his family (Apollo and me) there to share it with him. He admitted that he’d been a real asshole and had put a lot of really unfair stipulations on me, and that I was the only one that really knew him and understood him, and three hours boiled down into one sentence: he wanted to get married. Eventually, I agreed. We were going to wait a few years until we could afford a nice little ceremony, because we knew we weren’t going to get any help from either of our families with that part, and I didn’t have a ring or anything, and he was in Michigan and I in Florida with a brand new seven month lease that I was not about to break, but we were engaged.

The original plan was that once Eric got a job and saved up some money and found a reasonably priced place for us to live, that I would come back to Michigan. I had already emailed Mike, my District Manager at Cosi, and Lord knows why he said I was welcome back at any time, just let him know when I was coming. Well, he did say he was a little hesitant that I would leave again, but I had always done a good job while I was there and gave at least a month of notice before I left each time. However, no matter how diligently he looked, Eric could not find a decent job. He had sold his car in Florida to have money to go back to Michigan on, but his position had been filled at the independent dealer, and the Saturn he had worked at for the year in between had closed down, obviously, when Saturn went out of business. He was crashing on a friend’s couch and borrowing his dad’s minivan he wasn’t using at the time, and he was running out of money quickly.

Meanwhile, in Florida, I was actually loving living alone. It wasn’t terrifying like I thought it would be. I had my very own place for the first time, and it was mine.

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